I suppose I like being an outsider. There’s less to be held accountable for when you don’t follow the same rules. tonight was the super bowl. I try not to think about the past anymore though.
In the shower I thought about my sister’s smile as a child, but stopped myself. there is a world of future memories and some of them will glitter in just the right slant. it’s that old question: are you seeing the same light as everyone else or does only the brightness get through? I’ll never know.
The mundane: not being able to change the bathroom light bulb. how will it work? it’s stupid to call a landlord over such things. toilet paper in the dark. toothpaste to the left of the only thing I’ve ever stolen. but I don’t need to see. happiness is what you can live without.
How to get everything in one trip: the basket can carry several box dinners which will last a few days. but then there is the coffee. cigarettes. ‘marlboros’. he knows the kind.
The windows in my kitchen have crystals lodged inside from the previous renter. every time I see it, I think they must have been irresponsible for their own life. to rely on something pretty for belief has no real substance. today they looked like icicles encrusted over the branches from my neighbors tree. it shines hard.